Tag Archives: lovely people

Running for Refuge – Thank You

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I’m sure if you’ve been reading this blog you know I’m a huge supporter of Refuge, and will, if you give me half a chance, go on & on about how they need every penny they can get & possibly ask you to text RFTQ99 £1 to 70070 & donate a quid via text!

My Story

One of the things I did with Refuge last year was to share My Story with Refuge supporters & encourage people to run the Adidas 5K for the charity. It felt good to use something that is quite negative to hopefully encourage people to be more active, and raise money for a charity that needs & deserves it.

My name is Millie Lavelle and this year marks my 30th birthday. It also marks fifteen years since my mum was murdered by her ex partner, Rodney. She was killed while she was bathing my younger brother and sister.

For years my mum endured Rodney’s abusive behaviour and in 1995 she tried to end the relationship, only to find that the following day when we came home from school he had smashed up the whole house. My mum called the police and although Rodney was not charged the police told my mum they would hold him for as long as they possibly could.

We used that time to leave and go to Bedfordshire where my aunt lived. We took nothing with us- but then we had nothing left. A few says later mum spoke to the council but they told us to go back home because we had made ourselves homeless. We didn’t go back and instead I spent four months sleeping on an airbed in my aunt’s house.

Eventually we managed to get a small flat.  My mum started her own business and we were doing well. However Rodney found us and he gradually became part of mum’s life again. But he hadn’t changed- he still stole whatever he could get his hands on, money, furniture, my mum’s sewing machine and jewellery. Mum asked Rodney to leave and he stole her handbag as he left. We called the police, but they weren’t interested at all. All they did was suggest that my mum change the locks and cancel her credit cards.

But Rodney’s controlling behaviour didn’t end there- on 6th January 1996 I came home to find an ambulance and two police cars outside our flat. A policeman took me into his car and explained that there had been an incident, and although they ambulance crew had done all they could, my mum was dead after being attacked by Rodney.

Rodney was caught six weeks later. He was later convicted of manslaughter because he pleaded diminished responsibility.

Looking back now I can see how isolated and alone my mum was as she struggled to bring us up on her own. She was terrified of Rodney, but she didn’t know how to get help. She didn’t know that Refuge was there to help her to stay safe and rebuild her life, and my life, free from violence and fear.

That’s why I ran the Great Manchester Run for Refuge this year- in memory of my mum. So many women feel just like my mum- alone, scared and confused. They feel they have no options, nowhere to turn. But that’s not the case- thanks to Refuge. Refuge runs a range of services which protect women and children living in fear: from refuges to legal advocacy and community outreach schemes. It gives women and children like my mum, me and my brother and sister a chance to start a new life in safety.

Refuge opened the world’s very first refuge 40 years ago. It now needs your support to survive, and to grow, so that it can reach out to more women like my mum. Please help ensure that Refuge can be here for as long as women and children need support by joining their special 40th birthday team at the adidas Women’s 5K on September 11.

Visit https://www.womenschallenge.co.uk/onlineentry/. Places cost £15. Please select Refuge from drop down menu A, and tick the box so that they can send you a fundraising pack and a Refuge team t shirt.

You can also make a donation to help support Refuge’s life changing work just ‘RRUN40 £10’ to 70070 or £5 or £2- whatever you can give will make a huge difference to Refuge.

On behalf of my family and the thousands of women and children Refuge supports- thank you

Millie

Jessica @ Refuge was great, understanding & extremely helpful whilst I was writing it, and knew that whilst this is My Story there are also other people involved, my brother & sister, my Aunt & Uncles, my Grandparents and I was mindful that they could be upset by me sharing something that is quite a private issue.

One of the thing that struck me the most when writing my story was that it wasn’t that there was no one to help, if my Mum had reached out to my family they would have been there in a flash, and when we moved they were there for us, but because of the shame associated with Domestic Violence and that most women who suffer through it believe it’s their own fault, my mum never made the step to seek help, until it was too late.

Thank You

A little while a go I received a letter through the post. It turned out to be a card & gift from Jessica & all at Refuge.

I must admit I cried! I was part of  helping Refuge raise almost £26,000 by sharing My Story is amazing, and Jessica had taken the time to send me a hand written card to say thanks, and all I did was write out My Story.

Get to the point Millie!

Well I guess the point of this post is three way love fest of thanks!

Firstly, if you’ve donated to Refuge because of my rambling, badgering or whim, THANK YOU!You have helped save lives.

Secondly, if you ran the Adidas 5K for Refuge, or did any running for Refuge, Thank You & Please keep going. And Hey, how about joining me for a Marathon in October?!

Thirdly, To everyone at every level of Refuge THANK YOU. You save lives & you change lives on a daily basis. YOU’RE AWESOME.

Just one more thing…

Red Online Save A Life badge
While you’ve waded through this post take 2 more minutes to click the picture & join the Red / Refuge campaign. The aim of  Speak Up, Save a Life  is to ask that every police force in the country works alongside an Independent Domestic Violence Advocate in its work to prevent domestic violence and help save lives.  100,000 signatures are needed  so this debate can go to the House of Commons.

All you need to add is your name & your email addres.

Oh an I was serious about joining me for that Marathon, anyone a taker?

>2.03KM (36 min) & a clever Baby

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>Just a Thursday afternoon waddle around the local park really.

My little baby really has turned up the wiggle factor by about 10, and a stroll out in the sun we’ve got seems to send the little blighter to sleep!

I also found the following article, through Twitter I think, from Natural News.
Granted it’s a bit old, September 2009, but I like what it says…

“Children whose mother exercised 30 minutes a day score around eight points higher on standard IQ tests than children whose mothers were more sedentary,” says psychologist Richard E. Nisbett, author of Intelligence and How to Get It.

But best of all I like the closing statement

“The mother is the most important IQ agent here,” he said. “In families dominated by a father, there are higher mathematical skills but that’s all we contribute, I’m afraid.”

So there we go. It’s all down to the mummy, like we didn’t know it already!I’m glad I’m getting up off my bottom and doing a bit of waddling about.
 I’m certain that moving about more this pregnancy, compared with my last has made it better for me.
I certainly haven’t had quite so many aches and pains as I did last time, and while I’ve had *ahem* slower digestion (if you get my jist) I’m sure it’d be slower & more painful.
And while I can’t yet tell how clever my little wiggler is I’m certain the exercise is as much benefit for the both of us.

Meanwhile I must thank John, Maggs & Thomas who donated to Heart Research UK last night. The current total is £120 (including Gift Aid).

THANK YOU!

Sponsor me on Virgin Money Giving 

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>10k (1hr 36min 48 sec)

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There we go. Taken from the Great Run Results site, you can head over & check up on me if you like!

I took it quite easy & must admit found it quite hard to not to jog much more than the 1st kilometre. I didn’t quite manage to get the 1 hour 26 I was aiming for, I put this down to 2 reasons;

  1. I needed a wee for the whole 1st 5k, but couldn’t see any place to do one, and I wasn’t about to wee on the road side bushes, or test the theory that Police men have to let pregnant ladies wee in their hats. Then when I did get to one, just out side Old Trafford, there were queues, so I wasted time there.
  2. I just couldn’t get my walking pace quick enough without breaking into a full on jog, which the Mid wives told me not to do. I just couldn’t seem to get to those KM markers quick enough. 

But still I was 10 min behind target, and thoroughly enjoyed ever moment of the 10k. Perhaps I was a little dissapointed that there were no jelly babbies at the Bupa Boost point around the 8.5km mark. But the cheer & the shout out I got as I crossed the finish line made up for it!

.I am proud to say that I beat both the Monkey & the Lion running near meat the start, but the Giraffe started a  little ahead of me & I just couldn’t catch him, must have been those long legs.

I don’t have any pictures yet, but as soon as I do I’ll get some copies up on the blog.

The Donations website is open another 3 months, so you still have time to head over.

Many Many thanks to the people who have already donated & pledged money. You lovely lovely people…

Kate & Nigel
Lewis Jenko
Stew B
Neil, Vanessa & Catherine @ Fast & Fresh
Daddy & Lily
Lelia, George, Michael & Helen

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>Sponsor me the Traditional way. (sort of)

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>Ok, so not everyone wants to use the clicky links & put card details into the internet & while I’m certain no one REALLY thinks I’ll fail, some people prefer to be traditional & pledge the money & then donate after the event is actually completed.

It’s no secret that I’m rubbish with bit of paper & I’m quite nervous about loosing an actual sponsor form, so of you’d prefer to sponsor me the traditional way, then please do so.

Either, add a comment either below or through the Facebook thingy on the left, you don’t need your full name I’ll work out who’s who. Or drop me a txt, and email, a message on Facebook & I’ll add your name to the virtual sponsor form! If you pledge a specific amount the Virgin site lets me add the pledge to the running total & will even work out how much Gift Aid you’ll be adding too!

THANK YOU!